Invisable

Author's Note: This is my first poem ever. It is about how someone would feel invisible to the world around them. Enjoy!

I feel so invisible

It makes my life terrible

All I want to be is noticed

But nobody can keep focused

That is just my one wish

I hope no one will miss

When I take to the sky

And fly, fly, fly

Reasons

  Author's Note: This is a response the short story "Thank you, Ma'am." I would like you to comment on how I blended the quote with the story.         

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            It relates the quote, "Everything happens for a reason" because after Roger tried to steel the pocketbook, Mrs. Jones cleaned him up fed him, and gave him ten dollars to buy a pair of shoes. If he had not tried to grab the pocket book he would not have gotten any of those things, so the lesson would have to be that once you make a mistake you can change yourself into a better person.

Beach Mania

Author's Note: This creative piece is for a class assignment about a tale of long lost love. I would like to critique my dialogue. It is the cheesiest story I ever wrote.

          It was one of those drop-dead hot days, as Leila and her friend Natalie walked done to the local beach. The beach was overly crowded, with kids from school. Since Leila and Natalie were the outcasts from school, there was no way that they would be able make it through alive.

          "We should just leave Leila, there's no point in staying if we can't relax," Natalie stated, "Anyways my parents can pick us up and we can go swimming in my pool."

          "What's the fun in doing that?"

          "Not being humiliated in front of the whole school," she argued.

          "Fine, but let's get an ice cream first."

          They walked to the local ice cream shop, trying to blend in with everyone else, but of course the Blaine spotted them huddling together.

          "Look, the school losers just arrived," he stated as everyone else followed, "I should just throw them in, in might wash the pathetic off of them ," laughter filled the surrounding area.

          "I told you Lei, we should have just turned around and left," Natalie scolded.

           Leila had her mind on someone else. Her breath caught as she saw him standing there, sunlight dancing in his eyes. Him, as in Jake Wilson, the cutest guy in school.

          Natalie yanked Leila out of her day dream as Blaine made another comment, "Might as well leave as this beach is already taken."

          "It's a public beach, you don't own it," Leila through back.

          "Then how about that bath now?" he asked intimidating her.

          It was a miracle someone else stepped in, "Blaine, let's go, we got better things to do than to make fun of harmless girls," Jake told him off.

          "Are to standing up for them?" Blaine asked mockingly.

          "Yes, they've never done anything to you?"

          In a shaky sarcastic voice "Yes."

          Leila was about to fall to pieces as that heroic like action from Jake sunk in. No one ever stood up for the losers, except for teachers, who made the situation ten times worse. Especially Jake, someone so popular and noticeable.

          "Let's go," Jake said and starting walking away with everyone else following behind. Blaine's face was red hot with embarrassment as he gave some sad looking daunting faces at Leila and Natalie, since they had finally won that battle.

          Both girls smiled and concluding their day with some homemade ice cream.

The Revolution

Imagine you are watching people you have known forever, being killed right in front of you on the front lines of a battle. The heart-ache and pain you experience during this tragic, but real moment. The Fifth of March and the movie “The Patriot” are both relatable because of the life changing experiences each story combines.     

            Rachel Marsh, a fourteen year old indentured servant, discovers the true meaning of America through difficult events in her life. These events included the death of her parents when she was young, leaving her with no parental guidance. Benjamin Martin, from “The Patriot”, had a wife and 7 kids until tragedy had struck him and his family. His wife died a little before the Revolutionary war started, and once it had begun he lost his second oldest son between the fury of Great Britain and the colonies. After these tragic events, both had them confused on what direction to go in life. They found it experiencing what they had feared most: War.

            Rebelling and hatred started expanding throughout the colonies and Great Britain changing many lives in and around the war. Though didn’t change at first for the life of Benjamin Martin, from “The Patriot” or Rachel Marsh, from The Fifth of March. They discovered it through war. Watching the deaths of Boston’s townspeople on the fifth of March was the most dreadful thing Rachel Marsh saw her whole life, leaving her with the choice of becoming an American. An American isn’t someone who just lives in America; it is a person who can guide himself or herself and build on his/her beliefs and still be free. This relates the Benjamin Martin because of what had happened after the death of his two oldest sons who believed in being free and being a Patriot; fighting to free the lives of many people who had worked so hard to get America to be free. Benjamin did not realize this until the deaths of his two oldest sons leaving him to be what his sons wanted to be and what they wanted him to be his whole life: a Patriot.         

War can change anyone no matter whom, but battling is much more than emotions. It involves many tactics and rules each side must follow and what leads to that can cause damage throughout the rest of history. The Boston Massacre was one of the small battles that sparked the Revolutionary war and was around the time The Fifth of March took place. Rebelling against the British seemed to the only thing to solve the problems occurring between Great Britain and the colonies. Having been sparked by many small battles, the Revolutionary war had lasted from 1775–1783, a total of eight years with large battles between the colonies and Great Britain. “The Patriot” was placed just soon after the war had started.

The experiences you have in life are to change the way you think and to shape you out to who you should become. Rachel Marsh and Benjamin Martin learned how to become an American and a Patriot through incidents that changed their courses in life. If all you want to do is be free and to be able to speak for yourself, you are an American and a Patriot. Not because you live in America but because you can be your own person and be free.   

           

Mom's Present

Author's Note: I wrote this piece to tell of my mom opening her special present. I would like you to critique how well I explained the theme and how well the two paragraphs blended together.

            After the frantic night of wrapping presents and waiting for the excitment of opening presents of the next day was finally over. My sister and I jumped out of bed and rushed to wake up our parents. Trampling down the stairs we saw dozens of presents sitting neatly under the tree and stockings busting with candy. There was one suprise I nor my dad or sister could wait for my mom to open.
            Sydney and I had finished opening our presents it was finally my mom's turn. As my mom was slowly unwrapping the gift a smiled appeared on her face. It was a nookcolor! Something that she had been dreaming to get but never expected it. Mom was like a actual little kid on Christmas!